My apartment complex gives its residents a book each to read. July's book was Finding Home: An Imperfect Path to Faith and Family by Jim Daly, President of Focus on the Family. The premise of the book is about Daly's struggles in his life and the journey to who he became and the family he has today. If you haven't been able to tell, family is a big deal for me. Those that have it and don't realize what they do have make me sad. However, this little passage while scanning the foreward got to me:

Isaiah 38 (New International Version)
17 Surely it was for my benefit
     that I suffered such anguish.
     In your love you kept me
     from the pit of destruction;
     you have put all my sins
     behind your back.

18 For the grave cannot praise you,
     death cannot sing your praise;
     those who go down to the pit
     cannot hope for your faithfulness.

I don't know why it got to me; it just did. And into my head popped into my mind that sometimes these things we want aren't the things we're meant to have or do. God has other plans for us. My depression since Thanksgiving was part of this. I am still sad, but I like to think since I got my job, things are getting better. I'm still trying to listen and understand God's plan. I never did finish reading Don't Throw Away Tomorrow : Living God's Dream for Your Life. I started reading that in February and never got to finish it. As I was reading it, I had to start on a purpose I felt God assigned me at the time. Even, now, I wonder if I completed that task or did it just evolve in a different form. Today, I feel like it has evovled. Right now, I feel like instead of being the one that needed encouragement, I'm the one that has to give it. And right now, I even feel like my ecouragement isn't wanted. And yet, I don't feel like I'm to give up now, even when I want to.

In other news, my DirecTV is still now connected. They are "still working on it." Friday will have been about a month since I first tried to get this taken care of. Today was such a Monday at work. The air was so bad today I couldn't see Stone Mountain in the horizon. I can only see it in my office on a good air day. Last night, it stormed. Another storm is rolling in right now. Lindsey and Chris are going to come visit me in the beginning of August. We're going to a Braves game, see a Steven Curtis Chapman concert, and a trip to the Aquarium. I will be so happy to see them.

[♪ Listening to: "You're Not Alone" - Chicago]

Posted by Shawn at July 7, 2008 8:37 PM in General.