This is not an entry I want to write on Valentine's Day.

The other day, I wrote about having a purpose. I said there was one purpose that I didn't not want to have to have. Sadly, an hour after I wrote that, I had to start fulfilling it.

My best friend, Joey, called me. We had made plans for Friday to go to Statesboro to work on his Senior Project. He called to cancel the plans. And he had a damn good reason to do so. The girl he loved most of his life, the one he planned to marry, had died. It was a long distance relationship, but once he graduated college, he would move home and be with her. They made plans for the life they wanted. Last week, she had surgery. He told me this Saturday afternoon. She died Tuesday of complications. After speaking to her family, his family, and his professors, he called me. I rushed out to Armstrong, picked him up, and took him home to Fayetteville as soon as possible.

I got home from Fayetteville about an hour and half ago. I stayed 2 nights with him and his family. I was there if he needed me. When he told me of the surgery, something in me was moved. And scared this would happen. I didn't want this happen. Prayed that it wouldn't happen. I just wanted him to be happy. And this girl made him happy. But now, in addition to Joey being in a pain that's one of the most painful he's ever going to feel, the girl leaves behind her parents, her sister, and 4 children that are about to experience life in a way they never should. I can't question why it happened. No one can. However, we're going to keep asking these questions. Why? How? What could have been done to stop it? Why did God take her instead of someone else? What's God's purpose for this? And yet, as I learned with my mother's death, we can ask these questions until we're blue in the face. Nothing will bring our loved ones back. We can't change the past. And while words and gestures mean well, right now, they all seem meaningless. I never knew her, but I am touched by her. In many ways, the impact she had on Joey made an impact on me.

I would have stayed as long as he wanted me to. I was willing. I offered to bring him home to Savannah after the funeral, but his mother wanted to do it, too. He needs her more than me right now. He knows I'm willing to do what I can. However, right now, there's nothing I can do for him these next few days. I'm there for emotional support, but really, I would have been in the way up in Fayetteville. So, I came home. I did leave something of mine up there for him. I took my camera with me. I like taking road sign pictures, and figured on the ride up there, I would take advantage of the time and work on it. The ride was going to be uncomfortable, no matter what. He saw the camera and remarked about taking photos of her family while there. So, I came home, but left him the camera, explaining about the batteries and the memory cards. And the next few days, weeks, and months are going to suck for him. I wish I could take his pain away. All I can do is be there for him the way a friend can be.

I'll do the Thursday Threesome tomorrow. The only thing more I can say today is don't just use today to tell your loved ones you love them. Always tell them.

[♪ Listening to: "Je T'aime Encore" - Céline Dion]

Posted by Shawn at February 14, 2008 5:23 PM in General.