First off, this isn't a search engine query I wanted to speak of first. This is a note in the user agent I found. "Acuvue, the #1 Contact Lens in the World!" It's comes from a computer using the Johnson & Johnson IP system. 
Clever person whoever it was that decided to place an ad in the user agent.
And now for the thearch:
"celebrities are bad" - Is that Mr. Mackey?"DOCTOR TWIGGY BUCK ROGERS" - First NBC and now CBS.
"darren hayes's parents" - Sorry, don't really know much about Darren Hayes other than he's from Down Under and was half of Savage Garden.
"Jason Giambi Deodorant print ad" - Sorry; I don't have one nor the desire to have one.
"my report is gonna be about spring break what should i write about" - Since you're asking me, write about your own spring break for this year.
"10 ways to make a guy fall in love with you in 6th grade" - You're in 6th grade. It isn't love. It's puppy love, a crush. Odds are, you aren't going to marry the guy. Just be his friend. Be a good friend.
"Maddux & DeRosa & kiss" - I want to see that, too. I was watching that Atlanta Braves/Houston Astros game and heard the commotion in the stands but didn't know what it was for. I'm sure it was all in jest.
"songs about Chattanooga" - The only Chattanooga song I know is about the Choo-Choo.
"GETTING BLOGGER ARCHIVES TO WORK" - It's a booger! I've been trying to firgure out how to do multiple archives for Movable Type.
"build the perfect girl" - Except in computer games, you can't build the perfect girl.
"jason priestley's accident pictures" - Sorry; I don't have them nor had the desire to see them.
"puting a stop to quacks" -
"hallmark cards song - i'll remember you, and you'll remember me" - I can't remember Hallmark jingles. Just toy and fast food jingles. Oh and that one Clorox one. "Watchimals! Watchimals! They've got a watch inside!"
"listen to "until i find you again" richard marx" - Try his official site for a sample?
"savannah ga concerts" - Not much ever comes here, does it?
"Senator Saxby Chambless contact" - All senators have a webpage. However, Senator Chambless's page doesn't have much.
"Oakland's STomper" - I don't usually go for elephants but Stomper can make me make an exception.
"north shore agency" - All I remember is they are a collection agency out of Westbury, NY.
"What the Northwest Territories flower looks like" - Sorry, I do not know if it has and what the official flower for the Northwest Territories looks like.
"Which team won the reading phillies game yesterday" - Look at the Reading Phillies webpage for the answers.
"wsav phone number" I think you would have better luck with their phone number on the WSAV site.
"Who won th Cy Young Award in 2000" - What league do you want? Randy Johnson of the Arizona Diamondbacks won the NL Cy Young. Pedro Martinez of the Boston Red Sox won it in the AL.
"soul patches" - Can't stand the things. Looks as if a guy was too lazy to finish shaving.
"bankruptcy calculations" - I can't calculate a bankruptcy payment because they would never teach me that at my old job.
"mandy moore barefoot" - People and their foot-related fetishes!
"poems for a little girl graduation .com" & "essay to sister on graduation day" - Have you thought of "If" by Rudyard Kipling
"craig counsell wife had a baby" - They said that during the Braves' series in Arizona. I don't know more. Try the Diamondbacks' site.
"picture of meatball subs" - I eat them. I don't have pictures of them.
"My legs itch after I shave them" - So you do a query on that? Why?
Posted by Shawn at May 7, 2003 11:40 AM in The Thearch.
"jason priestley's accident pictures"-Which one? He's had like 30...
"My legs itch after I shave them"-That reminded me of this thing I did online when I was like 17, where you sign up for this thing and you get to give advice to girls. Each 'counselor' would get a different question a week and you'd email your advice to the person asking the question. The only question I ever got was from a 15 year old girl who was freaking out because she had a pool party the next day and she needed to shave but she didn't want to get red bumps on her bikini area because it would be really embarrassing...and I remember thinking "God, I wish that was my biggest problem in life..."
-L. 
Probably the last major one where he nearly died.
As for that girl, can we say Vanity Smurf?
Posted by: Shawn at May 7, 2003 12:25 PM
